You keep hearing that the most important thing in a relationship is communication, but you often encounter misunderstanding in relationship. When asked what the key to a healthy relationship is, you instinctively say: Communication.
However, good communication often seems elusive, leading to misunderstanding in the relationship. A barrier appears between you and your partner during discussions, turning them into a frustrating battle over who is right.
Terry Real, an internationally known relationship therapist, aptly says, “You can be right or you can be in a relationship.”
It’s challenging to accept differing opinions and to articulate your feelings, especially when your partner redirects the conversation to themselves, a classic sign of a misunderstanding in relationship. The art of effective communication is a learned skill, not an inherent one.
Listening, a vital skill, is transformative in communication. It can significantly change how you interact with your partner, reducing misunderstandings in the relationship. There are three types of listening in intimate relationships:
- Problem Solving: This is evident when your partner is speaking, and you’re thinking of solutions, often leading to a misunderstanding in the relationship. For example:
- Ann: “I’m so sad I didn’t get this promotion. I really hoped it would work out.”
- Bill: “Don’t cry. It’s going to be ok. Maybe we can…”
2. Empathy: This involves fully engaging with your partner’s emotions without trying to change them. Empathic listening is crucial in preventing misunderstandings in the relationship. It sounds like:
- Bill: “I see you’re sad and disappointed. I know you hoped it would work out.”
- Then Bill gently asks, “Do you want to talk more about how you feel?”
3. Relating: This type of listening involves being present and non-judgmental, crucial for effective communication and reducing misunderstandings in the relationship.
Misunderstandings in relationships often arise from different thoughts, feelings, and desires. When partners feel misunderstood, they may resort to talking over each other or shutting down. Learning these types of listening skills can transform your relationship, but like any skill, they require practice.
Are you experiencing misunderstandings in your relationship and seeking effective ways to communicate better with your partner? Don’t navigate these challenges alone. Schedule a consultation with Brigitte today and take the first step towards transforming your relationship through improved communication and understanding. Brigitte’s expertise can guide you through the complexities of relationship dynamics, helping you develop the skills necessary for a healthier, more fulfilling partnership.
