When Loving Someone Means Losing Yourself
You notice a change in someone’s mood and immediately wonder what you’ve done wrong.
You say yes when you mean no.
You spend so much energy understanding someone else’s feelings that you lose track of your own.
You may recognize these patterns and still struggle to stop them.
Over time, you can become so focused on maintaining the relationship that you lose touch with yourself.
How We Learn To Abandon Ourselves
Codependency often develops in relationships where connection feels uncertain or depends on how well we meet someone else’s needs.
We learn to read the room, keep the peace, anticipate reactions, and put our own feelings aside.
Over time, these ways of protecting connection can become automatic.
You might feel anxiety when someone pulls away, guilt when you set a boundary, or an overwhelming need to repair a rupture.
Your body responds before you’ve had time to think.
What once helped you maintain connection may now be keeping you from the kind of relationship you want.
This is the work we do together
Recognize your patterns
Notice when you begin managing someone else’s emotions, overriding your needs, or taking responsibility for the relationship.
Listen to the body
Learn to recognize the anxiety, tension, guilt, or urgency that can arise when connection feels threatened.
Develop boundaries + Self-trust
Practice recognizing what you feel, what you need, and where your responsibility ends and another person’s begins.
About Brigitte
I’m Brigitte Theriault, a relationship coach trained in Somatic Experiencing, Gottman Method approaches, and the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy.
My work brings together attachment, nervous system awareness, and an understanding of how we develop our patterns in relationships.
I’m particularly interested in the ways we lose ourselves while trying to preserve connection.
I help people recognize these patterns and develop the capacity for relationships that make room for both people.
You Can Love Someone Without Losing Yourself
Recovering from codependency is about learning to recognize your own feelings and needs, even when someone you love wants something different.
If you’re ready to explore these patterns, we can begin with a conversation.
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